Confessions of a Cat-holic (108)

Suavely and discreetly, Rex and I started dating upon mutual agreement shortly after the semester started. There was no confession, no declaration of love and no handbag courtship, whatsoever. But he was very qualified for the title of a boyfriend. I asked him to pick me up outside the classroom during lunch time and after school so we would buy lunchboxes from the food stores on Kennedy Road together. But he always delivered more than he promised. He was always on time and he would not let me pick up the lunchboxes myself, like they were some heavy weight dumbbells. He said he would get in line on my behalf to save my hustle and jostle amidst the lunchbox crises. I tried to test his limits by asking him to buy me some menstrual pads from a convenient store once and he just did what I told him so. I was pleasantly surprised by his gentlemanly manners.

I asked him to pick me up in school, as a way to reminisce my friend Angel because that was what she used to do, holding a basketball outside of class just before her games during lunch hour. I thought that Angel and Rex were very much alike, except that one was my guardian angel like the name suggested and the other was a guardian devil. Rex did not seem like the evil bad boy, if you knew what I meant. I never saw him swear, not even with his friends. He never showed any tempers and angers in front of me, and I was not curious enough to try his emotions.

We rarely talked on the phone. Or I would say, we rarely chatted, period. He didn't like talking much, as far as I remembered. We communicated with each other on a soul level though. Having grown up among the thugs from Wanchai, I knew very well how to get along with gangsters. Maybe he knew that I had a kin brother in the triad, maybe not. But I didn't have a chance to tell him my darkest secrets either.

I wanted him to walk me to the bus station in Pacific Place because it was a long walk through the Hong Kong Park. I just thought that it was romantic to hand hold my boyfriend in an urban oasis. Something magical happened when he held my hand. I experienced orgasm, wasn't that amazing? It felt like I wanted to faint for a few seconds and my mind paused for a moment, like everything around me fell apart and moved slowly against my consciousness. Okay, I would just say it was an orgasm, if that was not obvious enough. It was quite amazing to experience this just by hand holding my boyfriend.

In the beginning, he would just walk me to the bus stop after a 15 minute walk and drop me off there. Then, he would wait until the bus came. And a few days later, he would not let me go home by myself. He would take the bus with me together even though his residence was not at all on my way home. He always surprised me with his tenderness and considerate manners. I really could not ask for more from a boyfriend like him.

We liked to ask each other silly questions on the bus ride home. His favorite question was why the hell I was attracted to him. I thought it was a no brainer. Anyone would have fallen in love with such a healthy, sane and athletic gentleman. But I thought I should state the less obvious. I said that he was one of the purest person I knew. Yes, so pure so true, almost like pristine crystal which everyone could see through, so I confessed.

I thought the conversation would have ended like that. But he asked me to ask him back the same question. So I asked him as demanded, "why the hell did you fall in love with me?" He said I was one of the cutest girl he had ever known. He said I talked like a child, so innocent and infantile.

Was that even considered an attractive trait? I would not know. I doubted. Nevertheless, I told him I wanted to move to Thailand one day, with him specifically. That's what a gangster was supposed to do with his girlfriend. But he just laughed at my corny suggestions as if they were some silly stereotypes projected on screen. He never told me what was on his mind anyways, which almost made me look like talking to an enigma. I guessed that was the perks of dating a gangster.