Confessions of a Cat-holic (136)

With much ease, I implanted such an idea into the subconsciousness of my new friends, without them discovering of course, because they never watched TV or read any documentaries with a schedule dedicated to only physics tutorials and violin rehersals.

So now what? By means of reverse engineering, I could work out how I was perceived in my new friends' angle. I must have been a lucky girl from a lucky village by the ocean, namely Ap Lei Chau. I must have been from a fisherman's family, totally unaware of the toughness of urban life. I was a lucky one, with favorable looks granted from above. Pretty, attractive and somewhat retarded, like a blondie. Because life was fair, if I had outstanding looks, I must be dumb as hell, because no one could be intelligent AND pretty at the same time. I must have been the first in beauty and net worth in St Francis, leaving others only jealous of my looks and wealth because Wanchai was a slum, the Shum Shui Po of Hong Kong Island. With a residence in South Horizons, I already topped the class in home values because everyone else was living in caged houses. I was totally unaware that South Horizons was just a middle class district because I lived in a bubble for my entire life. I was arrogant, condescending and overly confident because I was fortunate enough to have never faced any difficulties or competition. I must have had an easy life where I grew up, with little rivalry as much as the need to get ahead. I must have been surrounded by kind angels because I grew up in a secluded girls' convent, totally ignorant of the world and surroundings. The Catholic Church must have molded my friends into sainted people who were caring, loving, nice, friendly and amiable, just like me. But Protestant Church was different. They were hardcore, resilient and brainy, whereas Catholic Church was cushy and somewhat lenient. Life in Central was full of rivalry as a result of material abundance, every other district was in extreme poverty and therefore peace. The oldest districts of Hong Kong, Wanchai, and Admiralty, were just Central dropouts. There were only two kinds of people in this world; the ones who wanted to get into SPCC but could not and those who actually qualified, as well as ones who could afford Central and those who could not. Monopoly board game had taught us that everyone aspired to live in the mid levels but it was just a matter of abilities not will.

God must not have spent a little more time on me. Given that I had the looks and face of an angel, I must have some major flaws. Like I could read and write in three languages like a native, but I had dyslexia. Like I had good grades, but was actually a retard. Like I had friends, but they must be backstabbing me behind my back. Like I had loving parents but they were divorced. Like I was the only child in my family but I had a step-brother by my father's mistress. Like I looked perfect and flawless, but I must be horny as hell deep down below. Like I had a boyfriend who loved me, but I only wanted to fuck him for his super sized dick. Yes, the Achilles' heel again. With overall strength, I had a fatal flaw and weakness in my character. It was that I was horny. That must be the case. I must love huge dicks.

I told you I could not understand my new friends' logic and mentalities. They said it was crucial to achieving success in life. It was called critical thinking, aka thinking "critically". When you analyzed a person, you needed to first find out, if not imagine, his flaws and weaknesses instead of holistically looking at the bigger picture. You needed to see everyone you encountered as your potential enemies. Understanding your rivals' major vulnerabilities was a first step for every battle in life.

I had yet to find out how unforgiving Central district could be, getting ready to be crushed in the CBD. The Hunger Games encouraged survival of the fittest, the only one who could outlast everyone else could take it all. Transferring from a cushy school like St Francis to SPCC must have been the worst decision and baddest mistake I had ever committed in my life...