Confessions of a Cat-holic (61)

Sharon really trusted everything I said, as always. If I could use a phrase to describe her, it would be "too simple, sometimes naive". She had been living in a dreamland fantasy world since kindergarten so I was not surprised to find out that she did a census on my school generating a yellow page to stalk all the target students she considered worthy of marriage. Again, as I said, there were no tycoons in my year when I went there. They must have already left by the time I gained my admissions. But Sharon somehow managed to locate a "blue blood" prince as she called. He was a few years below me. There was no way for me to get to know him in school.

His name was Jonathan Tam. Sharon told me to go to the church next to St Paul's Convent as a way to persuade me to transfer there. She told me Jonathan's mother, as well as his older sister Joyce, went to the church every Saturday. So she volunteered to be the pianist and helper of the fellowship meeting. She really was very desperate, so desperate that she actually told everybody she knew that she had a thing for Jonathan.

So I went to the church a few times with her, just to make her happy. She didn't know I hated Christians. That was her problem. She looked at the world the way she wished to see, nevermind the truth. She told me that she had a crush on Jonathan and asked me if he was attractive in my eyes. Er....he was okay looking. But he was a bit young, if took into consideration that I was only fifteen or sixteen at that time. A few years younger could feel a bit too much. Maybe I was just into mature guys, like Rex. He was a year above me, just so ideal to be my first love.

Jonathan left SPCC a year after I got in. I heard he went to a boarding school in the states. I never actually talked to him in person but I somehow got to learn so much about him through Sharon. She told me that his mother was a renowned politician in the congress. Her name was Dr Dame Rosanna Wong Yick-ming. His sister Joyce made frequent appearance on Hong Kong Tatler and was a graduate of Tufts University in Boston. Jonathan got into Brown University after spending a few years in a prep school and later wedded Robynn Yip, the grand daugther of one of the Eight Great Eminent Officials of CCP. Robynn Yip was also a vocal singer of the duo with Kendy.

I knew who's who in town. I told you I was a native third generation Hong Konger. I had my ways of knowing things. Robynn Yip technically was not my friend but I had heard much about her in my circle quite early on. It was before college when she slept with the headboy of DBS, Gundam the robot. She went around and told everybody that he had a small dick. And she actually described it with vivid details saying that it was only 5cm long when erected.

I didn't know Gundam personally but he liked to walk around like he was the hottest guy in town. He was a headboy with 8As in HKCEE while also relatively good looking. Allegedly he also starred in Stephen Chow's advertisement. He had long hair and a body over 6 feet tall. Who would have thought that his dick was ultra small. I didn't think a small dick was a defect. But the fact that he was so confident acting like he had it all made his unproportionally small dick a funny juxtaposition to his overall showy profile.

I remembered I was chitchatting on the phone with someone in the band 1 circle, maybe a guy friend from St Joseph or my neighbour in South Horizons. I didn't mean to badmouth him but I found it too funny not to disclose his dick size so I kind of told a friend that a girl who slept with Gundam went around making fun of his penis. Maybe my phone was tapped. I didn't know how Gundam found out about my private conversation and he was angry enough to call me Blair, the wannabe from Gossip Girl.

Shouldn't he be mad at Robynn Yip? She was the one who made fun of his reproductive organ. I was just an echo, if anything. What's wrong with that? Anyhow, the gossips that had been going around in the band 1 circle just further exacerbated the division among the top schools except that my rivals thought that they had unity and solidarity while my school was all loners with no sister ties or affiliation with any other schools.